A patient escaped his police escort through a crawlspace above the showers. The whole building went on lockdown (with loudspeaker announcements about not interacting with any naked men you come across) before they eventually found him a mile away, still starkers.
Barring a very specific set of circumstances or two, “don’t interact with any naked men you come across” is probably good advice.
My place of work used to have a fairly large “data entry” department until they… did… something to make that job kindof unnecessary. They laid off pretty much all of that department. And I’m told the boss who was over them before they were laid off returned to his office to find a sizeable human shit directly atop his desk.
Another story. My own boss (actually my boss’s boss) was a massive asshole. Committed the team to a completely unreasonable deadline in conversations with the C-level folks above him, and then threw temper tantrums when the deadline wasn’t hit. He turned the daily standup into a 7:30am (in-person) daily demo to prove we were making progress and weren’t… I dunno… slacking off or whatever. Many a temper tantrum was had in those demos as well.
I quit and made no secret of why. After I left, I heard through the grapevine that in a meeting with the CTO, the asshole boss accused the CTO of being incompetent and said that he was gunning for the CTO’s job. The CTO, sensibly, told the asshole boss to do not pass go, do not collect $200, security will escort you out of the building and we’ll ship you your personal effects from your office.
And then I quit the place I’d gone to and went back to where the asshole boss had been and I’m still working there. Definitely would not have considered coming back if he was still there.
Ok. One more story about the other place. They switched from one chat provider to another. But they never actually shut down the one they were migrating away from. Several folks never left the old chat. When it was discovered that on the old chat service, said folks were trading really really inappropriate holocaust jokes, the whole office got a talking to in very vague terms. It wasn’t until like a month later that someone explained to me what had precipitated that.
Kathleen brought salmon and nuked it in the microwave.
I work in 911 dispatch, so this is going to depend a bit on if we’re counting incidents that we’ve handled as dispatchers, or if we’re only counting incidents that physically happened at our dispatch center.
For the former, I’m going to just leave it at- we’ve handled a little bit of everything. If you can imagine it we’ve probably had something similar happen. I’m not going to go into any detail because our craziest incidents would probably be googleable and point you to my workplace.
Limiting it to things that happened here, we had one of the local crazies call in a bomb threat to our dispatch center. We weren’t taking it too seriously, he’s a known party and mostly harmless, but out of an abundance of caution our breaks were postponed while the sheriffs swept our building.
Our dispatch center shares a big campus with the county prison, and a few other county offices and facilities, we’re at the end of a long hilly driveway/private road with a guard shack at the top and the driveway for a few neighboring businesses branching off from it. It’s not totally uncommon for various people to be walking up our driveway, people from those other businesses out for a walk, people going to visit an inmate at the prison, the occasional person with business at one of those county offices, etc.
Anyway, one day one of my coworkers is driving into work and sees an older guy walking up the driveway, the weather was pretty shitty that day, so he decides he’s going to be nice and give him a lift up to the guard shack. He comes into work and by the time he’s logged in there was a call for a disturbance at the guard shack, the old guy was some sovereign citizen type trying to pull some first amendment audit bullshit at the prison. So we all got a memo about not giving anyone rides.
Shortly before I started, there was a small fad of people making s’mores in the lunch room microwave. One of the newer trainees was a younger guy, still lived at home, was a little clueless, and decided to make himself a s’more. He microwaved it way too long and smoked up the building, it was probably about as close as they’ve ever gotten to having to evacuate to our backup center. So we now have a “no s’mores” rule.
There was also one new guy that honestly probably shouldn’t have made it through our background checks who was a real piece of work. He is probably the only person in living memory to use the shower here, we suspect he may have been living out of his car. He had some weird shit on his record, some strange domestic bullshit, he was a volunteer firefighter and had been in trouble a few times for trying to pull people over with the lights on his personal vehicle (basically impersonating an officer) and was just generally a really strange dude. He nearly got into a fist fight with his trainer and that was the final straw. There’s been a few other weird stories involving him since we got rid of him but those are pretty googleable.
Not super crazy and this was a long time ago, but there was a guy who was just around 3 months with the company who was causing a ruckus.
We only knew about it because he went live on social media while he was at the reception floor of the building claiming the company was engaged in fraud or something. It wasn’t intelligible to be honest and I couldn’t really understand what he was specifically accusing them of. I think he was fired on that day, and he went live shortly after he was told. He also claimed he was not being allowed to leave, but I think the reason was he refused to give up the company mobile phone that was issued to him, claiming it contained evidence and he wanted to take it with him.
I never heard anything about it since, and I don’t know what happened to the guy and if the claims were true.
Worked at an absolutely soul-crushing gig after a new micro-manager took over and the next gig was slow coming. The micro-manager didn’t like one smart but blunt underling correcting him so he took away the OT and standby the underling had depended on - and us; the underling was smart as fuck - and financially ruined the underling by timing it right after a new car and house purchase based on that 10 year financial history.
Underling attempted suicide-by-hanging in front of our main dev area.
Company had counsellors for a whole day, and the micro-manager immediately focused on how unstable someone must be to commit to suicide instead of on how awful a workplace it must be.
The computer that controlled all the doors refused to open any of them, including the door to the room in which it was physically located.
It wasn’t quite HAL 9000 because doors could still be opened from the inside, but control over the computer was regained only with the help of a locksmith.
Facebook, 2021?
Was it that long ago? Wow.
What do you mean, it happened during the pandemic which was just last y… Oh.
A company I worked for announced that it had come to management attention that staff were socialising in the office, and that wasn’t allowed. To prevent it the doors would be locked until ten minutes before our official start time in the morning. I showed up at 7:30 the next morning for my shift and the whole team were milling around the front door because they couldn’t get in. Seems like they never delegated a manager to open up for us.
The policy was never rescinded, but they never tried enforcing it again either.
That was the day the locksmith changed his job title to physical penetration tester.
I was working part time as a software developer while a grad student and was assigned under a full time employee. We were the only ones working on that project. I came back after the Christmas break to be informed I was the new project lead because the full time employee i was working under got fired after he sexually assaulted one of the female employees after getting drunk at the company Christmas party.
Congrats on your field promotion
Had a guy bring in a sandwich baggie full of hair, put it in front of me and asked “Do those look like crabs to you?”
Nope’d the fuck out of that situation.
Just for clarity… The lad shaved his pubes, lobbed them in a bag then brought them into work and sought your counsel on whether or not he had crabs? Is that right? because I’m rolling around here picturing the absurdity of it.
Yeah that’s the gist of it 🤢
JAYSUS 😂
In orientation i was the demo for using the wheelchair safety straps and the guy giving the demo grabbed my dong in front of like 50 people
Follow up questions:
- Intentionally?
- Consentually?
- What happened next?
I was just so shocked i blocked it out until i was in my car lol. I have no idea why he did that.
Stay in character duh! You’re supposed to be paralyzed from the waist down!
An employee pissed into a co-workers potted plant and the coffee machine’s water tank, right in front of a security camera.
Errrrm…why?
I’d wager it was because they had a full bladder.
Haha thanks dad!
Partly because they weren’t aware of the camera, I’m guessing.
i wonder how many times I’ve unknowingly drank piss coffee
Food cart exploded.
Before my time, but they tell tales of the “Phantom Shitter”. Someone had… issues, physical and/or mental, and would leave streaks of waste both going to and from the bathroom. Very liquid waste. Sometimes stepped in. “Phantom” because initially no one knew who was doing it. They just found the results. Eventually he was found out, sent home for a bit, and then fired when it happened again after he came back.
Since I worked there: Guy came in for an interview. I don’t know if he was already having a bad day or what, but he got upset that his first interviewer wasn’t there to greet him at the front door. It escalated, rapidly, leading to threats of violence, an arrest, and a couple of cops searching his car.
I saw a dude lose a hand because they ignored everything about passing through the water tight doors when they were moving.
what line of work?
Crewman on a cruiseship. I was basically room service/janitorial. The guy who lost his hand was one of the kitchen people for one of the several restaurants onboard.
What’s it like to actually work on a cruise ship? I always wondered
My experience may be a little different than most; the ship I was on, for the time I was on it, was not actually in service yet. I boarded in Bremerhaven 2 weeks before construction would be finished and it started making its way to Hawaii. I fell down some stairs carrying some shit on our way across the Atlantic like 2 days before we got to NYC and I was going to be out of commission for 2 months, so they let me go. The only passengers we had were some bigwigs from the company.
As for fringe benefits and perks? I was averaging 16 hour days and you don’t get days off so I didn’t have the energy to do much other than sleep by the time my shift was over. But you only work 5-6 months periods, you get room and board, and since you’re not really spending anything you earn, by the time you get off to go back home, you’d have a pretty nice sum in your bank account. I had 1 month of paid training and was only on the ship for about 3 weeks, and when I got off in NYC, I had almost $10k.
Holy fuck that’s terrifying
IT guy who essentially did all the buying of equipment got arrested for selling some of it on eBay
