I’m a software developer, and I sometimes if I’m asked how something works, I can find it difficult to explain things in a way that would make sense to the listener, whether they are a PM or the client.

Other times, depending on the question, I simply don’t know the answer, and it could take hours for me to gain enough understanding of the project to even respond intelligently.

Have you asked them why they are reluctant to turn over the deets?

I’ve certainly withheld info because explaining DMARC is a lot more time consuming then just saying it’s a special type of spam filter.

Real life mechE here. I’ll tell you how my brain works.
99% of the time when I get an odd request from outside of the department, it goes one of many ways:

• the request is literally not in my scope of work and I let them sit for a day or two and then politely deny with a CC to my manager.
• the request is so vaguely worded that I could give a 2 sentence answer or a 20 page pdf answer or a PowerPoint full of flowcharts, and all would be “right”, leaving me in a state of decision paralysis and needing clarification.
• the request is something I can help with but I don’t know your technical capability levels, so I try to keep it very generic and high level as to not simply knock you over with a technical dictionary.
• the request is in my scope of work and very doable, but I do not want to inadvertently share information that I may not be allowed to divulge freely to other parts of the company.
  And of course, there’s a lot of CYA reluctance too depending on what’s being asked.

If you’re asking first or second level engineers things like “how does your technical work flow do it’s thing?” you are starting at the wrong level for a documentation project of this massive scope. Engineers have managers whose job is to translate requests into technical terms and figure out who is the best at doing what. That’s what mine does: he takes a super weirdly worded ECR (engineering change request) and translates them into technical steps and clear direction for me. Then I can pick out the details needed to make it happen, confirm them, and document them.

You need to define clear needs out of your request: start with your end goal, the processes you need, the mechanical details of the processes you need to write, how much detail you are comfortable with, and the format in which you want it . and take all of that to the senior or director level of whatever department manages those systems. They may or may not know the exact information you need, but it should be their job to delegate and translate the request such that their reports can collate what you need in the form that you need it. And because it’s the director delegating, the engineers have inherent CYA and will be a lot more comfortable giving you what you need.

If you are saying things like ‘I’m not interested in punishing anyone for past decisions or mistakes’, I think I can see the problem.

Frankly, it’s tiresome trying to describe technical details with business analysts who glaze over something you’re passionate about, treating it like nerdsprak. If the engineer has spent any amount of time producing a solution, you can bet he’s passionate and invested. Give credit where credit is due and don’t sound like an obnoxious condescending douchbag when doing so. People can tell when a disinterested person is giving fake praise. It’s quite different when a crowd of peers is giving recognition of a job well done. And no, you’re probably not as smart as they are in their field of expertise.

Also, listen to their input. They don’t want a product with their name going live with a feature the bean counters want, but the engineers know make the product worse. It’s like a mom watching your daughter to go to prom with a cheap haircut because dad as too cheap to fork out for a perm. You know what I mean.

My experience is you get the best response if they understand why you need the information and at what level of detail. They seem to respond well to clarity, organization and logic (who doesn’t!), so prepare your communications to include the background they need (how does your request help them in the long run), what it is you need from them (and in what format), and when you need it by. Trust is built by demonstrating your value to them. Think about ways you can help them get the info to you (start the work for them, book time on their calendars to focus on the request, sit with them and help them produce the info).

Side note: engineers sometimes offer information that is not executive ready - you will either need to translate or tell the engineer who the audience is for the information.

Be interested when they talk about things and ask questions. Engineers stereotypically have been told too many times that they need to dumb things down. And there’s a large percentage of neurodivergent people in software engineering who like to info-dump, but have been told their whole lives that they were boring or they overshare. But often when they are given the opportunity to share openly or even better, people show interest in learning, they usually will open up. It might take time, and it might take you getting a basic understanding of some technical topics so they don’t have to explain those basics to you to even start explaining their work.

I have worked as an analyst, product manager, project manager, engineer, and architect. So I tend to be really good at bringing business and technical people together by interjecting a few details that an engineer might skim over because it’s basic to them as well as interjecting business scenarios that a business person might consider obvious, but an engineer might get frustrates because it was never explained to them and they like to know “why”.

Talk less, listen more.

They’re probably (no offense) nerds, so let them nerd out and listen to them.

Then actually act on what they say, and soon they’re be telling you more shit than you want to know.

I’ve worked very closely with engineers and I’m engineering adjacent myself. Most of the highly technical types I know in every field (myself included) struggle to talk to people about their job because they no longer know what normal people do or don’t know and they don’t want to come across as condecendong. Like for me the basic refrigeration cycle feels like something everyone should know but I logically know that actually isn’t the case and at the same time I don’t know where the laymans actual knowledge on the topic begins. Like do I need to start with explaining that boiling liquids remove heat? Do I need to start with what boiling even is? Do normal people even know that things boil at different temps at different pressures? If I start explaining any of this are they jist going to look at me like I’m an ass and say “Of course I know how thermodynamics works”? Eventually I just decide it’s better to not to talk to them.

At the same time though, if you do manage to break the ice with them then you are more likely to sucessfully get a passionate stream of consiousness rant from them because they’re passionate and now they know that you can be trusted not to see them as being condescending when they overexplain. Honestly the best way I’ve found to break the ice with technical types is to get them to start complaining about some part of their job. That also sounds like exactly what you’re looking for if you’re trying to make their jobs easier. But if they start seeing you as someone who it is safe to complain to then they will start seeing ypu as someone it is safe to talk to about other things.

Also as always there is a relevant XKCD.

https://xkcd.com/2501/

Install linux/*bsd on your work device (that you take into meetings). Respect from engineers will immediately skyrocket : D

I’ve tried to make it clear that I’m not interested in punishing anyone for past decisions or mistakes—on the contrary, I want to learn from them to create a better process moving forward. My goal is to collaborate and make their jobs easier, not harder, but I think building trust and comfort will take more time.

I’d wager that the engineers have experienced such promises in the past and got burned. Engineers, by nature, are very analytical. Re-gaining trust that was once burned will take a lot of work. And managers like you are exactly the kind of people that burn engineers.

They are probably unsure of your motives; are you analysing the business or analysing them? Software problems are extremely hard to estimate unless there is almost complete disclosure and discovery. It’s like asking people how long a crossword is going to take without seeing the clues. Or asking how long they’re going to spend on a chess move in 3 turn’s time. They are possibly cagey because you are asking questions that betray the fact you are seeing this as a management problem rather than listening to what they’re telling you about their craft.

Or possibly your manner of communicating is attuned to more socially intuitive people. Try presenting what you need as a problem for them to solve with a clear start and end. That way you’re collaborating, and they know when their obligation to interact with you is “done”.

Instead of open questions like “can you tell me how X is currently working?” try specific problem setting questions like “I’d like to see if we can make X process be 10% faster, what would that look like?” or “what would you say are the top two things that affect the time process Y takes?”

They may not want to offend you, because many of the answers might be “obvious” and, also, if they’re honest workers, as many are, there may not be any clear way to improve certain things as they’re already trying their hardest, and your investigation feels more like an inquisition.

Again, it may be that you’re asking someone “how can I get you to get this crossword done faster?”. It’s sort of the wrong question. Unless you’re willing to listen to their bugbears which might be the actual things affecting how efficiently things run but might not be the kind of answers project management want to hear.

https://media.tenor.com/rGSj2L2GVecAAAAM/on-the.gif

As an engineer with almost thirty years of experience, I don’t want to be on the hook for telling someone the wrong thing. Also, if you want an estimate there are lots of engineers who won’t want to give an estimate of 2 months when you’re expecting 2 days. Then we have to explain that the entire app is a fucking unmaintainable shit show because we’ve been doing two months worth of work in two days by cutting corners and writing shit code and we know it.

Also they could just be shy introverts. But it’s probably a reluctance to commit themselves.

I say all this like a universal truth, but just by reading all the responses here you can tell it varies from person to person. You have to assess your team and figure out each individual. My experience is it’s a trust/comfort thing, but that may not be your case.

Anecdote from my first job (software engineering): New manager wants to know what our team does and how our process and software works. Like, he really really wants to know it!

Okay, I book a timeslot and prepare some slides and an example; we have a meeting. I go over the high level stuff, getting more and more specific. (Each person on our team was responsible for end-to-end developing bootloaders for embedded HW.) When I got to the SW update process and what bit patterns the memory needs to have and how the packets of data are transmitted, he called off the meeting and I’ve never seen him since.

I guess, he didn’t want to know THAT much after all.